A Mother's Diary

[Lady Adel de Blakeland]

(( Note: This is my character's Mother's diary. It's basically for character developement/backstory purposes. Kept some of the entries from which I RP'd in the room with, and will add to as time goes on. Most of you are probably clueless to who I am right now, but hopefully that'll change! I'll add in small doses what I collected, don't wanna overwhelm that page.))


Lady Adel de Blakeland
•GREAT HALL•
...is within the Great Hall...

Flipping the pages, the book was worn in appearance, but the pages were still very much in tacked. Allowing it to open on a seemingly random page, her eyes skim across the words carefully: ' Twas a foolish mistake to allow oneself to become with child with such a monster of a man. One should not be so harsh on oneself though, there is no control over such matters. I am but a woman, we were made for man to dominate us and we must play our part and subdue. Oh how I prayed for a miracle, to be barren, but alas my prayers went unanswered and now a child must be brought into this madness. ' after reading those words, she slammed the book and glanced towards the flames, her lips pursing, her mind ticking. Jenkins had saved the book and had only given it to her days after their 'escape', she hadn't allowed herself to read any of it until feeling 'secure'. Though why had she opened it on that page? Why not just start from the beginning, she argued with herself. There was more to this.

It was proving harder than she thought, the truth of her Mother's words, what if she couldn't handle the truth? Frowning, a battle raged in her mind, she must find the strength to simply face it with no excuses of emotion! Downcasting her eyes towards the book once more, she opened it onto the first page, and the tip of her finger tenderly ran across the name written inside: Adelaide Costello. Taking a deep breath, she turned the page and started from 'the beginning'. Narrowing her eyes, she read the first entry: ' I am soon to be married to Sir Robert de Blakeland, a noble and knight, the two often go together one has found. My dear Sister, Emma, thought it would be an idea to document my life from here on out. At first, I thought that it would simply be a chore and a bore to do so, but the idea has grown on me and that is why I have decided to write my first entry. What can one say of one's betroth? There ought not to be preconceived opinions of such a man, for I hardly know him at all. And what little I do know, is merely based on whispers in my ear. T'would be dangerous to have thoughts of a person based on idle gossip. One is sure he is a fine man, time shall tell.' Slowly, she shut the book. " How wrong you were, Mother. How terribly wrong " she said quietly to herself, a deep frown set into her brows as she allowed the words to run through her mind once again.

The tips of her fingers gripped the edges of the book, she would read no more, not this evening. She needed time to digest every single word, no matter how insignificant it might be, somewhere the important things would come to light. Blue orbs were once more set upon the fire, becoming lost in the flames. Of course, she had hindsight, but by reading words written by her Mother, it felt like she was alive again and that she could try and help her....try get to her change her life's decisions. But she couldn't, it was a helpless feeling that she had, one that sat heavy on the heart and made the stomach churn. And she wondered if her own life was mirroring her Mother's, that was until she and Jenkins took drastic measures to change the course, for the better, she hoped.

[Dream Loxley]

Great to see you here.....love your writing!

[Lady Adel de Blakeland]

Lady Adel de Blakeland
•GARDENS•
...is somewhere in the gardens...


There was no faffing about in her chambers today, she had been up with the sunrise and had been scrutinising her Mother's diary in the gardens for the best part of the day. Infact, she was still found sat on the lush grass, legs crossed and bending forward at the waist. Both of her arms were extended infront of her, palms pressing against the ground and holding her weight while she beared down over the diary, lost in the words. Intense blue orbs soaked in every bit of information: ' Tomorrow I shall wed Sir Robert de Blakeland. Is one looking forward to such a feat? Apprehensive is a word that best describes my feelings about the whole affair. Mother keeps telling me to keep my chin up and smile, I do my best and hope to bring honour to my family. If one is completely honest with oneself, my greatest concern is not with the occassion itself, but what is to follow, the wedding night. If rumours be true about Sir Robert de Blakeland, though I am sure they are not, but if so - I have something to be fearful of. I am well aware that he has been married perviously and has Fathered other children.' she paused from reading, clenching her fist and ripping up a chunk of the grass, before slamming it down heavily into the ground.


Of course, she knew she had other half siblings, but she had had little contact with any of them, there was little to no choice in that matter. Though she met Liam and Jai and had a grand time with them. But the two of them considered themselves to be 'nomads', they didn't stick around long. Sighing softly, she dropped her gaze back towards the pages, flipping to the page, where the wedding day was spoken of: ' After all the planning, the big day came and went in a flash. And where am I now? Sitting alone on one's marital bed. Sir Robert, my Husband, was called away on 'urgent' business. I do not know whether to feel insulted or pleased that the consummation of our marriage has been put off. Truly, does that mean that we are yet still not Husband and Wife? Is it not said by the Church that only when consummation is 'complete', only then is the union complete. I pray for our relationship to be a good one, for he and I to be a happy union. Ah yes, I almost forgot to mention. I have a new aid, Jenkins. He has served my family for years, though I never had the pleasure of meeting him, he is a very honourable man, very loyal. I am happy that I am not completely alone, at least. Though there are other servants, one's own aid is always 'special'.' A fine brow slowly arched. Of course, she was aware that Jenkins had been her Mother's aid, but she had not known he had been around since the beginning of the marriage. Hmm.


After reflecting on the words written by her Mother, she went on and read some more: ' This evening we got word that Sir Robert would not be returning for at least another five days. There has been some dreadful news from one of the neighbouring villages, it had been attacked by outlaws and overrun. Apparently, the outlaws burnt almost every single building to the ground. Sir Robert is commanding the Militia, whispers on the wind say that they fast approaching the outlaws and should soon have them within their grip, so that they might smite them. Even though this news weighs heavy on the heart and I pray for the souls lost, it also brings a sense of gladness and hope, Sir Robert is proving to be a man of God and justice, and a man such as this can not be a brute as rumours have suggested. Soon I shall learn for myself. In the meanwhile, Jenkins and I have been exploring the lands of Blakeland Manor, he is such a funny fellow and as a joyfulness about him that is so endearing.' Her eyes instantly snapped away from the words, and she sat upright. " Joyfulness? Endearing? Jenkins? " and she couldn't help but burst out laughing, surely this was not the same man?? Of course, when the words were written, Jenkins was but a young man himself, probably full of promise.

[Lady Adel de Blakeland]

Lady Adel de Blakeland
•GREAT HALL•
...is within the Great Hall...

The sounds of the hall, the general chatter and servants walking about, all seem to fade into the background as she was sucked once more into her Mother's diary. And she did not know it, but her eyes had started to squint, her mouth ajar as she read the next words: ' Sir Robert de Blakeland, my Husband, returned from battle this eve. It was a great relief, but the relief was short lived. Upon his arrival, the servants and I had prepared a feast in honour of his defeat over the outlaws. Those cruel men, if one can call them as such, had even killed children as they slept! We were in high spirits, that he had returned without so much as a scratch, but apparently our joy was not matched. He immediately had the servants expelled from Blakeland Manor, telling none to return until his say so. I thought this be a rash decision, but I knew not what he had seen and so as the dutiful Wife, I held my tongue.' she paused from reading, looking across at the flames. So far, she hadn't found much amiss. It was reasonable that a man might not be in the best of moods when returning from battle. Quietly, she reflects, before lowering her eyes once again.

Both of her brows were raised, obviously focusing on what was written: ' Once all the servants had left the Manor, I was for the first time, alone with my new Husband. His mood was foul, and though I would much prefer to avoid him, it was not an option. And so, I did what I could to sooth him, to no avail. The feast had gone to waste, infact, he had me throw every scrap of food away while he stood and watched. After which, he made me feel guilty, the hard labour in which had gone into producing the food, meant nothing to me, he said had said. And going a step further, he dare say that I lack respect for those 'lower' than myself. ' at reading this, she tutted loudly, which warranted a side glance from a nearby guest. But she paid no mind and read on: ' He said that one must learn my place and that I must learn soon or actions would be taken where by I would quickly reform my 'attitude'. This had simply been caused over a feast that he did not wish to partake in, though again, I considered what state of mind he might be in after going to battle and allowed it to rest. Tomorrow is another day.[/i]' Again, her Mother felt so alive when she read these words, of course she knew the outcome.

[Lady Adel de Blakeland]

Lady Adel de Blakeland
•GARDENS•
...is somewhere in the gardens...

ALL: For the past couple of days she had had a dodgy tummy, she wouldn't dare say that it was something she ate because she knew how well prepared the meals were around here, but perhaps was merely the warm weather that they'd been having. Being that she was of fair complexion, it had a far more greater effect on her then it might with someone who was darker. But though she blamed the weather for her discomfort, she could now be found sitting underneath a tree in the shade and taking in the fresh air, which was mixed with the scent of many a different flowers which were in full bloom by now. Resting her head back against the trunk, strands of blonde hair got caught up between the bark, it was a good thing that she hadn't yet noticed this. And she had been quietly reflecting, going over the everything that had happened in the past month or so. Well, she certainly wanted an adventure, but she hadn't banked on this kind. Very soon, she would have to approach someone for advise and hope that they would give it. That someone she had already picked out, but was hesitant to say a word to him. He seemed wise enough. The tips of her fingers rest over her Mother's diary, which was placed in the centre of her lap. Maybe there were some pearls of wisdom to be found in here? As she tilted her head forward to gaze down at the diary, she let out a: " Owww " as her hair ripped from being entangled with the bark. A look of extreme frustration and annoyance held her features, but it soon faded, and she calmed rather quickly. With a heavy sigh, she opened the diary from where she had left off.


Lady Adel de Blakeland
•GARDENS•
...is somewhere in the gardens...

ALL: Blue orbs run over the words in the pages of her Mother's diary: ' Tis the day after the failed feast, which was an attempt to celebrate my new Husband's victory over the outlaws. There is no reason to forgive him for his outburst, it is but human nature when one is faced with having to lay down the law and carry out justice by the way of the sword. Though on much reflection, his behaviour was somewhat bizarre, he favoured spending the night alone in the dining room, rather than consummating our marriage. I must say, I am in way pleased that he decided not to on a night that his mood was so foul. But he has spent more time brooding over the fact that food was wasted as opposed to the spilling of the blood of the innocent, and might I add the outlaws too, who shall be judged by their Maker. The servants are yet to be recalled to their duties, so I took it upon myself to prepare a breakfast for the two of us. Sir Robert did not even once look at me, nor did he speak a single word, it is a discouraging start to a marriage. I hope and pray that tomorrow shall bring him into a better mood.' Looking up from the pages, she glanced across the gardens and watched silently as guards matched past on the patrols. And she couldn't help but wonder about them, individually. Were they married? Courting? Did they treat their Wife well? What stories did they have beyond these walls. Running the tip of her tongue along her lip in thought, she went back to reading the diary, not before turning the page first, of course. On second thoughts, she didn't think she could stomach anymore at this time, and closed the diary shut.

[Lady Adel de Blakeland]

Location: Private Chambers
Time: 1:45am

-::- No doubt the majority of the Kingdom were fast asleep, resting peacefully in the Land of Nod. As for Adel, she couldn't sleep a wink and so found herself slumping lazily on the chair positioned infront of a small table. Is it any wonder that she could not find her sleep, her mind was racing, thoughts of the past week or so events replaying in her mind. Some of the details had been thankfully blocked, still unable to work out if what she had done was wrong or right. Her Mother's Diary had sat on the table, untouched for awhile now, reaching towards it, the tip of her finger pressed down at the corner of the book and then dragged it back in her direction. It would be the first time that she would read the diary since Jenkins' death, perhaps it would help? Without further debate, the book was opened and she began to read:-::-



' Heavens, one has been awfully busy and preoccupied with marital bliss for the past month that one has failed to update one's diary. Sir Robert and I have grown more close than I could ever imagine in such a short space of time and after a hiccup of a start, he has shown a side that possibly most others have not seen, I feel blessed that he has allowed me passage through this wall of protection that he seems to have built on the exterior to shield his sensitive heart. And what a most caring and giving heart he has when it is shown.

The days have past peacefully, in the way of duties that may have called my Husband away from my side, and one dreads the day when he must leave once again, for one shall miss him terribly. Indeed, the fondness that one feels for this man is something that has taken me by surprise, my heart flutters each time he walks into the same room as I. Could this truly be the blossom of true love? As inexperienced as one is when it comes to the love of a man, that which a Wife should feel for her Husband, I dare say this is exactly what I am experiencing. And how wonderful it is, to feel as high as the skies. Yes, Sir Robert has drawn one in and claimed my heart... yes, it must be, it is true.

Most of our time we have spent frolicking in the fields behind the Manor, Sir Robert has found favour with one's navel and quite enjoys to venture further to.... '


-::- Slams her palm ontop of the page before her eyes catch sight on any further words. Having no wish to find out any futher details of her parents 'playful times' behind the Manor, she abruptly turns the page. Feeling somewhat flustered by that find, she couldn't understand how the marriage had become so sour. Though the beginning had not been a happy start, the pair seemed to have 'found themselves' and making a go of things. Straightening her posture only for a second, she leans down and close to page, her face only inches away as she finds the next entry and begins to read once more:-::-

' I swear, the man's mind has no balance! As we strode quite happily through the market place one sunny afternoon, a young man who could have been no older than 19 years approached and offered me a daffodil. Of course, being that he was of lower means, I accepted such a gesture and found it to be a humble gift from one who appeared to struggle to even rub two pennies together, that is to say, poor. In the blink of an eye, Sir Robert had grabbed the poor lad by the scruff of the neck and begun to pound a heavy fist to his abdomen. Why, at first, one could not register what was happening! Of course, I had no wish to witness such violence and tried to cool the coals of my Husband's rage with words alone. But the inferno could not be tamed, he had entered a complete and utter frenzy. The young man had been thrown to the ground and continued to receive a thorough beating. And I sent out pleas to the crowd that had formed, among them were men bigger than my Husband, but not a single soul wished to intervene, perhaps in the knowledge or even a whiff of who Sir Robert was and therefore fearful of repercussions. Unable to stand it any further, I put my hand upon Sir Robert's shoulder and he immediately responded with a back hand to one's cheek! The force near toppled me over, but I am pleased to say my efforts paid off. Sir Robert had snatched the flower and dabbed it into the lad's bloody nose, the petals had become drenched with blood. After which the flower was handed back to me and I was accused of having the boy's blood on my hands for being an 'immoral woman', were his words. There had been no time to check on the young man, for my Hubsand had dragged me away by the wrist before I could, promising that the next beating will be reserved for I! '


-::- For the countless time, she slammed the diary shut. What had set her Father off? A commoner giving her Mother a flower? Though she agreed such a thing to be inappropriate, the reaction was somewhat, over the top. Had she been in the same position, she would certainly have refused such a gift, at least...she 'would' have before coming to Windstorm, some of her views had been altered slightly.. and she was beginning to see people for who they were, as oppose to 'what' they were, or more to the point...their status. With a sigh, she rose from the chair and headed back to the bed, to try again for some shuteye. How she could sleep now with further thoughts on her mind was beyond her. It just reenforced her hatred for her Father more and more.-::-